原句: Strong reading skills are an important factor in students' success in college.
修改后: Strong reading skills are important for students’ success in college.
原句: His advisor is an expert in the area of sociolinguistics.
修改后: His advisor is an expert in sociolinguistics.
Mark Twain著名的写作窍门就是“Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very'; your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.”
Her brother was very convinced that she would not survive.
Clearly, he could not defend his position.
原句: He was very afraid when he saw the police.
修改后: He was terrified when he saw the police.
原句: Children moved very fast to scoop up candies.
修改后: Children scurried to scoop up candies.
原句: There are stink bugs in every room of my house.
修改后: Stink bugs have descended upon every room of my house.
原句: There are some students who seem to have a natural gift in writing.
修改后: Some students seem to be naturally gifted writers.
原句: Every single person should love reading.
修改后: Every person should love reading.
原句: This new innovation will blow your mind.
修改后: This innovation will blow your mind.
类似的还有terrible tragedy, future plan, past memory, 等等。
首先要恰当使用关联词(transitional words/phrases)将句子或段落衔接起来，使句子清楚明白，段落间自然过度。常用的关联词有累加（如in addition, furthermore）, 类比（如similarly, likewise）， 转折（如but, on the contrary）, 总结（如in conclusion, in short）, 等。
原句: We arrived at the airport. We saw that our plane would be late. Robin took advantage of the delay to go to the newsstand. She looked for a paperback to read on the plane. I went directly to the gate. I realized I should have told Robin to buy me gum. Robin got to the gate. She told me she'd thought of it. She handed me a pack of gum. It was my favorite.
修改后: When we arrived at the airport, we saw that our plane would be late. Robin decided to take advantage of the delay to go to the newsstand and look for a good paperback to read on the plane, but I decided to go directly to the gate. It was then that I realized that I should have told Robin to buy me some gum. Fortunately, when Robin got to the gate, she told me that she'd thought of it herself. She handed me a pack of my favorite gum.
* This example is from www.universalclass.com "How to Refine Sentences to Improve Your Writing"